Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Scar

Today started off moody and gloomy.
I was surrounded by this aura of mine which was so dark and overwhelming.
Couldn't smile or joke at all.
Did not speak to anyone for the first two period.
I only waved and texted people.
Just didn't feel like talking.
I didn't eat anything until 10.
Used my breakfast and chit chat time to do extra homework.
I kept looking at my watch every now and then.
Today was like a judgment day to me.
Then, 9.52am.
Mum's text arrived.
'I'm here, it's raining and be quick.'
Miss Jean went on and on..but all I could think about was to get out of 3.16!
And so, the class ended.
I ran like a mad woman towards my mum's car.
Then we started our journey to Assunta Hospital.
I'm due to visit my 'bestfriend' a.k.a my scoliosis doctor.
This visit would determine whether I would need to undergo operation.
We reached there around 10.30am.
I went for X-Ray first.
This is the most boring yet scary stuff.
I did the routine stuffs, need no reminding from the radiologist.
I stripped down to underwear only and wore that ugly green robe.
Then, I waited with one room of people wearing identical robe.
Some with their feet wrapped, some with their head wrapped and some on wheelchair.
I made mummy wait for me in Starbucks because one people worrying is still better than two people stoning together.

'Jolyn Toh?'

It was my turn.
The radiologist took my X ray for about 5-6 times.
It was freaking long and I changed from room to room just to get screened.
I wondered how many cells of mine have died in the process.
This changes of room thingy did not occur the last time I came to visit Doctor CCS.
It was a long, boring and nervous 1 hour for me.
I couldn't help fidgeting.
By 11.30, everything was done and I'm back waiting outside Dr. CCS clinic.
It was freezing cold outside his clinic because it was raining heavily outside.
At the same time, I couldn't help wondering what Normy, Lai and gang doing.
How I wished that I was there with them.
Instead I was here alone in this big building surrounded by painted white walls.

Then, I entered the room.
Dr. CCS showed me my X-ray film.
First thing he asked me 'How old are you?'
I said '17++'.
He was silent for a while and then he went 'Luckily you're 18 soon, else a surgery is a must, my dear.'
He added 'and your shoulders are parallel, so you do not need to worry.'
Well, now the answer is an operation is optional.

So..

why the need to go through the pain and give myself a scar?
However, he needed me to go back for another visit 6 months later.
The next visit will confirm whether I really do not need a surgery.
And also maybe I can say Goodbye to my braces a.k.a my longtime sleeping mate since I sleep wearing it every night.

I couldn't feel more relieved.
It was like a heavy burden got lifted off my chest.
Well, it's not like I'm scared of the surgical knife.
It's just that I did not want to give my parents the mental torture.
I started talking and I went Starbucks for a second round with my mum :).
Afterall, I didn't eat anything since morning.
Then, we journeyed back to Taylor's.

After hospital visit

Maybelline was giving free make over and free products.
Normally I would reject but today I felt adventurous.
And so I went and I did a make over.

Stuffs they gave me

Please help me through these six months.

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